The Weight Challenge

So, a few days ago, I stepped on the scale (well the Wii board) for the first time in over a month. I was shocked to see that my weight had crept up, dangerously close to the most I have ever been. Now, I know much of this is related to stress, which I have been experiencing a lot of But, the glaring number staring back at me from the screen was a wake up call that I was in no way prepared for. I know I should have noticed the cues. I only have one pair of jeans that fit me and they are the biggest pair I own, I'm winded at everything, and I've been overly tired. All signs I am stressed and fat. That's right I said it FAT. I must be honest with myself if things are to change. It isn't just a little overweight, it isn't just chubby, it is fat.
I'm not comfortable in my own skin. I look at old pictures of myself and think "what happened?" Now, I'm not saying I want to get back to that point either. Weight has always been an issue, when I was younger I was underweight, grossly. Now, I'm over, what I think is grossly. I just want that middle ground, where I am not ashamed of my own body.

So, I've started keeping track of my food again and have made some healthy changes that I will continue to follow. I have, also, set goals that I feel are realistic.

Goal One: Keep track of all calories. This makes me face the facts and makes it easier for me to say no to snacking. I think to myself, "Do I really want to write this down?" The answer is usually no. Also, I can look at the calories I have eaten and realize I am not hungry

Goal Two: Keep track of all exercise. This way I can see exactly how much I am doing and, as opposite of calorie tracking, I can say "if I do this, I can add it"

Goal Three: Yoga and meditation. These are great tools for me to relax and remove stress and any stress relief that isn't eating is good.

Goal Four: Don't beat myself up. I understand it will take time, I understand that weight does not change the person I am, I understand that even if I fail I can still be on track. Remember this!

This week's weight in: Here is my brutally honest check in. I am starting at a horrible 178 and barely fitting into my larger than normal size 10 jeans. I hope to finish the week at a 170 and comfortably fitting into those jeans.